I wanted to fall in love
with you,
with life,
with something.
To surpass any limiting beliefs.
A pilgrim on a journey,
an explorer in the vast universe.
I needed to leave
the unworkable behind.
Conventional roles assigned,
contracts I made with people.
Success is that four year old child
scooping up compliments.
Yes, the operative word to hear.
You really do have a brain
and wow what a way with words.
Pride surrendered I walked the avenue
with empty pockets.

I wanted to fall in love with humor.
Laughing at stuffing myself into an
underwire bra two sizes too small.
Joking with boys at the school dance.
Sweating nervously in my maxi dress
watching the clock tick away the hours.
A funny business this coming of age.

I wanted to fall in love with a blood orange sunrise.
Sheets of silver to skate upon.
Robins hopping on the crisp fallen snow.
The ginger tabby defying a stream of
cars crossing the road.

I wanted to fall in love with the blues again.
Nina Simone, Sinatra.
Voices smooth like velvet.
Who could ever forget Billy Eckstein
singing or BB King belting out,
“The Thrill is Gone.”

I wanted to fall in love with poetry.
Write about the sheer madness
we engage in daily.
To see with fresh eyes.
Never to gaze upon a dragonfly or darning needle
in quite the same manner.
To take a few moments and describe these winged creatures.
Iridescent and beautiful.
Jewels reflecting a rainbow of light.

I wanted to fall in love with a man who could teach me things.
Like where the Northern most star is located in the night sky.
How to make boysenberry pancakes from scratch.
To groom the dogs and keep them off the furniture.
No, seriously I was a beginner here.
I wanted to learn how to make love.
Each day mastering the little things.
Listening when you were sad or unreasonable.
Becoming more compassionate.
Respecting we all have our chosen path.
Discerning I was not the woman you needed.
A rose growing wild, unfashioned.
Letting go took some time.
I wanted to fall in love and I did.

Rita Joy Scavo’s passion for poetry began as a child. She writes prose as well as an occasional memoir but poetry is where she finds her voice. Her poem ” The Questions ” was published in Caveat Lector’s Spring 2018 edition on-line. “The Prayer” was featured in The Avalon Literary Review Fall 2017 issue. When not writing the poet enjoys cooking for friends and spending time appreciating the beauty of Lake Moraine where she makes her home in Hamilton, NY.